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About Digital Art / Hobbyist Member Elbow McgeeUnited States Group :iconfantasticality: Fantasticality
 
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well it's been a while since i last posted here
some life updates:
-i got into college! yay me! i'm going to hopefully study art and computer programming to try to get a job in video games
-speaking of which, i'm looking into applying for an internship at a nearby gamedev studio, more on that when i can find the courage to send an email

i realized tonight -after a short bout of feeling entirely inadequate because of comparing myself to others- that it's been close to 5 years (minus some months) since i joined this site and started really getting into digital art and really trying to get myself out there
and i suppose that doesn't really matter except that i started thinking about what i was like back then
i was 13, not good enough to actually commit to doing art but thought waaay too highly of myself, and i always got angry when i saw someone my age -or younger- who was markedly better than i was
unfortunately that part hasn't changed much, except i don't have the confidence to think highly of myself and instead of getting angry i just... well, cry okay
and thinking back on the things i've said and done, i was a real annoying jerk!! 
even today i regret... pretty much everything that came from that era
fortunately, and god i don't know how, i made older friends, we stuck together even when i was -i realize now- this really terrible oblivious kid, 
now, at least in recent months, i've come to really appreciate those people -lookin at you m'rin and rinny! :)- who stuck with me through that phase who i really looked up to
tonight i realized that hey, i could be one of those people, i realized, wow i don't know what i'd do if people started looking up to me -mess up, that's what-

i guess the best way to start is to dispense some knowledge i've gleaned over these past 4 years and 5 months

1. if you're 13 and just starting out, do your best, experiment, go out of your comfort zone with art or writing or whatever you do, just do AS MUCH as you can, make those characters, join rp groups!! enjoy the freedom you have to experiment right now. later on you'll probably regret some of the things you've done, like i do, but that's okay. you're going to change every year. you'll look back a year from now, look at your art, and say "wow what was i THINKING." and you know what? that's improvement. that's good.
2. if you're looking back to when you were 13, don't think about what you regret, forgive yourself and relish in the comfort you once had with experimenting, the freedom you had. you know what i'll say it again: FORGIVE YOURSELF
everyone should remember that every day you learn new things about the world, some will make you want to cry.... or make you actually cry, but remember every once in a while to look back at how far you've come!

okay this got really rambly and sappy and i'm not even sure if it's comprehensible, peeps may not believe me too, that's fine, you do you guys

you do you
Can Can Cannibalism by Malusdraco
Can Can Cannibalism
why the hell not, might as well, another goretober that i really liked
pretty gory this time around, decapitation, blood and cannibalism warnings
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Sire by Malusdraco
Sire
just sorta an art update, i'm sick of seeing all the old art associated with my name
here's something new (and I post it here because it went decidedly unnoticed on wysp and tumblr, i can NOT let that happen when i spent more than three hours rendering it)

participating in goretober, one of the prompts was bloodbath, i went from there
mature filter because there is a quite a bit of blood and i wouldn't want anyone to be triggered! other than that though nothing too bad (i would think)

i tried to do it romantically, you know, in romantic style with the really high contrast, chiaroscuro 
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well it's been a while since i last posted here
some life updates:
-i got into college! yay me! i'm going to hopefully study art and computer programming to try to get a job in video games
-speaking of which, i'm looking into applying for an internship at a nearby gamedev studio, more on that when i can find the courage to send an email

i realized tonight -after a short bout of feeling entirely inadequate because of comparing myself to others- that it's been close to 5 years (minus some months) since i joined this site and started really getting into digital art and really trying to get myself out there
and i suppose that doesn't really matter except that i started thinking about what i was like back then
i was 13, not good enough to actually commit to doing art but thought waaay too highly of myself, and i always got angry when i saw someone my age -or younger- who was markedly better than i was
unfortunately that part hasn't changed much, except i don't have the confidence to think highly of myself and instead of getting angry i just... well, cry okay
and thinking back on the things i've said and done, i was a real annoying jerk!! 
even today i regret... pretty much everything that came from that era
fortunately, and god i don't know how, i made older friends, we stuck together even when i was -i realize now- this really terrible oblivious kid, 
now, at least in recent months, i've come to really appreciate those people -lookin at you m'rin and rinny! :)- who stuck with me through that phase who i really looked up to
tonight i realized that hey, i could be one of those people, i realized, wow i don't know what i'd do if people started looking up to me -mess up, that's what-

i guess the best way to start is to dispense some knowledge i've gleaned over these past 4 years and 5 months

1. if you're 13 and just starting out, do your best, experiment, go out of your comfort zone with art or writing or whatever you do, just do AS MUCH as you can, make those characters, join rp groups!! enjoy the freedom you have to experiment right now. later on you'll probably regret some of the things you've done, like i do, but that's okay. you're going to change every year. you'll look back a year from now, look at your art, and say "wow what was i THINKING." and you know what? that's improvement. that's good.
2. if you're looking back to when you were 13, don't think about what you regret, forgive yourself and relish in the comfort you once had with experimenting, the freedom you had. you know what i'll say it again: FORGIVE YOURSELF
everyone should remember that every day you learn new things about the world, some will make you want to cry.... or make you actually cry, but remember every once in a while to look back at how far you've come!

okay this got really rambly and sappy and i'm not even sure if it's comprehensible, peeps may not believe me too, that's fine, you do you guys

you do you

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Malusdraco's Profile Picture
Malusdraco
Elbow Mcgee
Artist | Hobbyist | Digital Art
United States
i'm an artist who doodles over everything
some people say i'm morbid and i'd have to agree with them.
mainly i draw manga and dragons, usually fantasy things...

oh yeah...
i do commissions and i do requests and gifts and trades!
and if you steal my art or any of my friends' art i will
BITE YOUR HEAD OFF!!!!!

not to mention i play cello and swim
also i am an anime freak and will talk about almost all the anime's i've watched...
that is all
Interests

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:iconlittlerabbitkid:
littlerabbitkid Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Nice to have you back here! :hug:
Reply
:iconmalusdraco:
Malusdraco Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
i don't think i'm back for good, maybe less inactive than usual? but heh i do miss things here a bit ( :
Reply
:iconlittlerabbitkid:
littlerabbitkid Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
That's okay! :hug:
Reply
:iconfauxydingo92:
FauxyDingo92 Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Thank you for the fave!!
Reply
:icontheperian:
theperian Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2014  Professional Traditional Artist
Thank you for adding 'Erato' to your collection! :heart:
Reply
:iconlittle-cruel-thing:
little-cruel-thing Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks for the favs :)
Reply
:iconaumari:
Aumari Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2014  Student Digital Artist
you play cello... you swim... you love anime... you draw...

I HAVE A DOPPLEGANGER!!!???

LOL but seriously I play cello and I swim too! what a coincidence!
Reply
:iconmalusdraco:
Malusdraco Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
SWEEETT!!
cello bros gotta stick together -these days it's all about violinists :p cellos always need lovins-

also what do you swim??

also name an anime, what have you seen??
Reply
:iconaumari:
Aumari Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2014  Student Digital Artist
yussssss omg

I've seen Naruto, Bleach and a couple other that i can't remember. I'd say Naruto is my true favourite though XD
Reply
:iconmalusdraco:
Malusdraco Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
(guuh sorry for the late reply ;;)

ooh man have you seen gurren lagann? if so i would recommend. it's got the same iconic kinda style as naruto (though i've not seen naruto, doesn't it have like 500 something episodes???) or maybe darker than black, i'd think it's similar to bleach -from what i've seen of bleach- in that it's got badass characters with sicknasty powers
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